Saturday, December 24, 2011

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

2 Quarters, 2 Dimes


You have to pause for a second and consider the ramifications of the above image. I've provided a few below ... and it's by no means an exhaustive list:

  • The paper it was printed on ...
  • The ink used to print it ...
  • The machinery used to create it...
  • The manner in which it was processed ...
  • The many hands it took to handle it ...
  • The envelope it came housed in ...
  • The stamp which enabled its journey ...
  • The method in which it was delivered ...
  • The entire history of this one single item ...

I'm going to stop this process right here, right in the middle of its tracks.

You see, I think it's rather ridiculous for it to continue its natural course. A seemingly logical conclusion will just have to be cut off at the knees.

And I don't think it will hurt one whit ...

................. Ruprecht (STOP)

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Lunar Eclipse


I wish I could have been there ... but the text message was just as good ...


Daughter: "I saw a lunar eclipse it was awesome!!!!!"

Father: "Very cool! I couldn't see it. Too many clouds here. What did it look like?"

Daughter: "It looked like an orange smiling at u ..."

................. Ruprecht (STOP)

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

The Best Comment Ever

An associate of mine (I hear he's a fine, upstanding young man) received the following comment.
He got a gold star for recognition.
I unabashedly take the comment - in its entirety and exactly as received - and post it below for your dining and dancing pleasure.

Happy reading.

................. Ruprecht ( STOP )

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Monday, November 21, 2011

Please Observe Frantically


"Welcome to day one of National Lose Your Mind Month And A Half, when nothing aside from freaking out over the holidays is accomplished."

- Clark Brooks

................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Cup 'O Meat™


................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Sunday, October 2, 2011

This Could Be What The Beginning Of Alzheimer's Looks Like ...


Not long ago, I was helping to cook dinner. A television was sounding off in the background behind me with some program that caught my attention, an intense situation or other which triggered a thought:

"You know what I ended up falling to sleep to last night?" I asked my cousin who was preparing one thing while I was preparing another. "No Country For Old Men, with Javier Bardem playing that strange Anton Chigurh character. I only caught a bit of it, but what I saw was interesting."

She replied: "Wait ... isn't that that movie with that cowboy guy? Kind of grizzled? Chased Harrison Ford in The Fugitive?"

"Yes, it was."

"What's his name?"

"The guy who was after Harrison Ford?"


"Yeah."

"Hmmmmmmmm ... he's on the tip of my tongue. Just can't place his name. And he's been in everything. Damn! Now that's going to bug me until I figure it out."

"I'll just go look it up on the computer."

"No! I need to figure it out for myself! Don't go look. It'll come to me."

We belabored the question in a myriad of ways. We shot off movie after movie after movie after movie trying to figure out who he was. (Of course, it was Tommy Lee Jones we were thinking of, but we just couldn't put our collective finger on his name.) Men In Black, Rules Of Engagement, Space Cowboys, Batman Forever, Natural Born Killers, JFK, Lonesome Dove ... nothing. We just couldn't place it. Cripes ... we even went back so far as Barnaby Jones where he played a doctor. Still didn't trigger any memory.

My cousin gave in first and headed for the computer. "Don't you dare tell me who it is, cheater!" I yelled after her.

She came back a minute later with a Cheshire Cat grin on her face. "You're going to die when you hear who it is ..."

"Don't! Don't you even think about it! Don't tell me who it is! I've at least remembered he has a unique name of some sort ... I think he goes by three names or something." I was pretty confident on that part.

But, as hard as I set my mind to the task, my mind was a desert.

"I'm telling you who it is," my cousin told me.

I glared at her.

"It's Tommy Lee Jones."

"Gaaaaaah ... !!! That's who it is!" I exclaimed. "I knew that ... !!!"

"Wait," she said: "What movie were you talking about he was in again?"

................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Sunday, September 11, 2011

10 Years Ago ...


The morning of September 11th, 2001, I was at home.

Home was 3565 Saddleback Road in Park City, Utah

The television was on, my wife and I were watching incredulously at the horrors unfolding before us ... the newscasts ... the reactions ... the images.

I remember playing with my daughters. I thought about my youngest daughter - not yet a year old at the time - and what kind of world she wouldn't know as a result of the day. I remember my eldest daughter and I petting her cat, Stigma. It was a very reflective moment, playing with her, watching her watch her cat.

I remember going outside and looking up at the sky that afternoon and marveling at the planeless sky above me.

I remember reciting a silent prayer to God asking for him to watch over all the people touched by the tragedies of the day ... I did that several times during the day.

And I know He heard me.


................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Independence Day


"I pledge allegiance to the flag
Of the United States of America,

and to the republic for which it stands,
one nation under God,
indivisible,

with liberty and justice for all."

................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Thank You, Men & Women Of The Armed Forces

(The following was originally published on September 11th, 2010. Given today's announcement, I thought a repeat was completely appropriate ...)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I wasn't necessarily looking for inspiration today.

I just figured it would come from out of the blue somewhere.

Sure enough ..... it did.

    Boomer
    God Bless America

    withthebanned
    Land that I love


    Zoiks
    stand beside her


    Darmon
    And guide her


    Boomer
    through the night


    Boomerette
    with the light from above


    Darmon
    From the mountains, to the prairies


    Zoiks
    To the oceans, white with foam


    Ruprecht
    God Bless America. *Our* home sweet home.


    Boomer
    nicely done (*second verse, same as the first*)

................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )


Sunday, March 13, 2011

New Word

... epigrammatic ...



................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Fooling Myself


It'd been a while since I had eaten.

I didn't do dinner the night before and it was only coffee that morning, so I was hungry. I had several errands to run and thought I would just grab something on the fly.

The problem however was that between work and my destinations the quick in-and-out food purchasing options were practically nil. With the exception of my old nemesis: McCrappage.

*sigh*

Begrudgingly, I pulled into the drive-thru line and decided on a chipotle Angus burger. How bad could it really be? I'd had the mushroom and swiss Angus concoction previously and it was passable. I noted on one of the decorative lawn signs beside the order kiosk a picture with the burger I wanted spilling out red onion, so I made certain to place my order sans condiment. I don't like red onion. Matter'n fact, I verified it with the guy who took my request.

This may have been a mistake.

You see: While the burger was tasteless ... while the bacon on the burger had an inclination toward cardboardy-ness ... while I was thankful the overly pungent chipotle sauce slathered on the sandwich at least gave it some sort of flavor, I believe the red onion I asked to be held may have actually made the meal appreciative. Because, let me tell you something: This particular lunch? One I'll tuck in the back of my mind as a "order if desperate only" selection.

I keep fooling myself food at McCrappage will be good. It has to be every once in a while ... right? Especially if you're famished ... right? Anything's good when you're famished ... right? Right?

Right ... ?!?

Bueller??? Bueller ... ???

................................... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Customer Service Done Right


This is the way it should be done:


I ventured into
Claro's Italian Market early Saturday afternoon to pick up a couple sandwiches my cousin ordered. I was greeted by a full house, everybody and his brother seemingly "shopping Italian", looking for authentic foodstuffs for the weekend ... or to possibly whip up that special Valentine's meal two days hence.

Wandering over to the deli counter, I realized I needed to grab a number for "more efficient service". Understand, this isn't your standard "gimme half a pound of mortadella" and you're out the door; the folks purchasing meats and cheeses and whatnot linger and consider and question. So, if you're in a hurry, Claro's isn't the best choice for you to get in, get out.

A good 12 minutes in, my number was finally called: "Number 76!" by a loud and bit gruff deli dude. I tossed my number in a throw-away bucket and told him I was here to pick up a call-in order.


"Dude: You should have told me as soon as you got here ... you didn't have to wait around," he stated. As it turned out, it wouldn't have made a difference as they hadn't even started the sandwiches called in 30 minutes prior.


"Look ... sorry ... let me do this: I have some excellent roast beef on the slicer. Want a sample?" He was obviously in a mode to make up for the faux pas.


"Only if you have a little horseradish jack you can slap atop it," I commented.


"Done," he answered.

Inside 15 seconds, I was munching on a thinly sliced, rolled up layer of roast beef with an equally thin slice of exquisite tangy white jack nestled within. It was deli heaven.

"Isn't that outstanding?" he cajoled. "Now, I don't know about you, but make a grilled cheese out of that particular jack, add some hot tomato soup along with it and you have something satisfying." He slapped the counter. "Your sandwiches will be up in a minute ..."

But, before he left, I told him: "You know, you're good, you. You're a salesman. And not in a bad way. Give me a quarter pound of beef and cheese, please."


He smiled. "Thanks. Tell my boss I'm good. He's right behind you, down the aisle there ..."


I proceeded to do just that. I walked half an aisle down and confronted his superior while he took care of my order. His boss looked up as I approached, seeing I wanted his attention.

"Hey guy ... I just wanted to let you know: That gentleman there?" I pointed at him behind the counter "He's good. You might want to keep him around for a while."


The Boss smirked. "Good to hear. Because I was gonna fire his ass at the beginning of the week. Thanks." We both smiled at each other and as I returned to the counter, I was handed my sandwiches and my meat and cheese, professionally, tightly and neatly wrapped.


And that's what customer service is all about: Servicing the customer. Pleasantly offering advice ... samples ... friendliness to a stranger ... unencumbered assistance.

Deli Dude did his job and knew he did it well, made an extra little sale to boot.

And I got something I wasn't expecting:
Faith and assurance there are still people out there who know how to work customer service in the big, bad world ...


............... Ruprecht ( STOP )


Tuesday, January 25, 2011

People Are People …


There are certain things said which are totally worth it.

This is one of those things …


............... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Monday, January 17, 2011

Better


You know what would make this show better?


If the name was changed to:


“Million Dollar Monkey Drop”


............... Ruprecht ( STOP )

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

I Think Her Name Was 'Dakota'


Today, as I sat and ate lunch in my car, I saw a woman sitting on a bench waiting for a bus.

And she was good.

How good was she? You be the judge:

It was about 59°F degrees outside. Yet she was in a bare-armed tanktop, she was continually drinking from a soft drink container and she fanned herself incessantly.

As a matter of fact, after about 5 minutes of fanning, she put on a big, bulky jacket ... apparently because she grew cold from all the fanning she did.

I mean … this woman was that good …


............... Ruprecht ( STOP )